When words aren't enough...

When words aren’t enough

Our overuse of superlatives sometimes leaves us grasping for words that can adequately convey what we want to say. What happens when I experience something that really is ‘awesome’? If ever I needed a better word, it was today.

This doesn’t make easy reading and it wasn’t easily listening but the experience of a tour of Claire House Children’s Hospice at the invitation of the wonderful Amanda Mitchell really does deserve a better word than awesome.

Right now, as I write this, there’s a young couple from Merseyside saying their intensely personal goodbyes to their stillborn daughter.

What was supposed to become one of the happiest of all life events ended in the unexpected shock and unmitigated tragedy of the baby dying in her mother’s womb as she approached full term. And that after months of growing expectation and preparation by family and friends for a completely different outcome.

There are two incredible spaces at Claire House called Butterfly Suites where bereaved parent and their close relatives have all the facilities, privacy, dignity, specialist support and, perhaps most important of all, the time they need to begin to come to terms as best they can with what has happened.

They are able to say their goodbyes, over several days, with hugs, words, photos and the opportunity to take treasured memories such handprints and footprints. Precious time together.

This particular family had no previous connection with Claire House but was referred by a caring hospital doctor – apparently not many are aware of the superb end of life facilities that Claire House offers. The alternative? Probably the best they could have hoped for was an hour’s visiting slot at a local undertaker’s chapel of rest.

It was moving, amazing, incredible to think that this heartbreaking scenario was being played out while we were in the building.

Claire House is a place for the support and end of life are for children and teenagers with life-limiting conditions. There’s seldom a happy ending and yet I have never seen so many smiling people in one place who derive massive satisfaction simply from using their skills and time to make a difference to those young people. As one of the team told us, it’s sometimes the little things that make the biggest difference.

The place is bright, filled with love and some superb facilities all designed to provide comfort, enjoyment, sensations, experiences and above all, happy memories.

We all know about hospices and many of us have visited friends and loved ones there but if we’re honest, they're not places we like to keep front of mind.

Our tour was as harrowing an experience as it was inspiring and uplifting. This is a place full of smiles and optimism, brimming with love and dedication.

Listening to the professionals when they speak of the joy of being part of giving young people and their families special memories is really humbling.  Goodness only knows the price these people pay for the emotionally challenging work they do. Awesome doesn't come close.

I’ve always thought it not much short of a scandal that such places have to rely on the generosity of companies and individuals for donations to sustain their work. Given their massive contribution to society, they deserve proper Government funding.

I was struck by how grateful the team is to do what they do; time and again we were thanked for the interest we’d show by just turning up for a tour.

It’s not the easiest of visits but it’s certainly one of the most emotional and thought-provoking. Go and see for yourselves and then tell others what you’ve seen.